What’s Blocking Your Connection To Source?

By Amy Brucker

A client of mine made a strong confession during our first session together:

My purpose is calling, I can feel it. I just can’t get to it.

Not for lack of trying, I’m definitely trying, but something isn’t working.

She wanted to make money by engaging her purpose. She wanted to have fun integrating her spiritual gifts into her work.

Yet at the core of her desires, what she really wanted was to feel deeply connected to her Soul. She wanted life to flow through her instead of getting stuck at the logjam created by the belief she’d inherited from her grandfather: “Poverty is a Virtue.”

Instead of flow she felt anxious.

She wasn’t getting any sleep. She was exhausted. She was getting older.

And the possibility of one more birthday without the deep Soul connection she desired was more than she could bear.

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What If Everything You Need Is A Mile Away?

By Amy Brucker

Louise and I lived in the same neighborhood for ten years. I walked by her house on a regular basis. We never met.

One day, Louise was walking with her dog Bodhi when an inner Voice told her to take a right turn instead of her usual left. She did, and because of this, we met on the sidewalk. Something clicked between us. We exchanged numbers. We’ve been inseparable ever since.

For as long as I’ve lived here, I haven’t met anyone in this town who’s become a friend, and it’s not for lack of trying. I’ve done all sorts of things to meet people, but alas, it wasn’t in the cards.

Then one day, I met Louise. Instant BFF.

Sometimes life is like that. There’s struggle for ten years and than bam! You shift something simple, take a different turn, and open yourself up to receiving exactly what you’ve been wanting. It was there the entire time, you just didn’t see it.

Everything You Need is a (Metaphoric) Mile Away

The things you need are close to you already. If there’s anything you’re pining for, that you’re truly needing, it’s right there, you just don’t see it yet.

It might be close in the physical sense, like Louise living a mile away.

But it might also be close in the energetic sense, like a lifestyle you desire.

And it’s right there, so close you could practically touch it.

The problem is, you might be looking in the wrong place, sticking to a routine that is just a touch off where you need to be. Or you’re looking with the wrong perspective.

The point is, everything you need is a mile away. All you have to do is tune in to the Voice that’s guiding you to get there.

It might take a day. It might take ten years, but when the Voice says, “turn right”, it’s important to turn right.

How Do You Know if it’s the Right Voice?

Learning how to distinguish the Voice of your Higher Self from the Voice of Fear is a process. They have a distinctly different quality, so it’s helpful to experiment on a daily basis so you can be ready when you really need to trust your inner guidance.

The Voice of Fear usually has a force to it. It’s harsher, abrupt, demanding, commanding, pushy, sneaky.

The Voice of the Higher Self is usually a gentle or firm suggestion that’s wrapped in a sense of indifference, or perhaps calmness.

It’s important to practice discerning the difference so you know which voice is speaking to you when you most need to know.

Listen

As you go about your day, no matter what you’re doing, pay attention internally for blips of images, thoughts, words, sensations. Each one might be guidance for your journey, helping you course correct so you end up going where you most need to be to fulfill one of your desires.

It might take a minute. It might take ten years. But if you listen, you’ll get there.

Think about an area in your life where you feel stagnant and frustrated. Then think about the inner guidance you’ve been ignoring. There is likely a direct correlation between the two.

Where is your inner guidance leading you? What direction has she given that you’ve dismissed?

Interesting to think about, isn’t it.

Sweet dreaming,

Amy

Is It A Really Good Idea To Make Friends With Death?

By Amy Brucker

Years ago, when I was studying shamanism, I did a shamanic journey to meet my inner healer. I didn’t have specific expectations of what I’d find. I thought it would be a wise old woman or a white bearded man. But that’s not what showed up. Instead, I met Death.

Death came to me, cloaked in a ubiquitous black robe, shadows where the face should have been. I looked at him and panicked.

Did this mean I was dying?

Did this mean I was sick?

What did this mean?!

When the journey was over, I met with my teacher and told her I failed the exercise. I saw Death, not my Inner Healer. She looked at me and said, “There are two aspects of the Inner Healer, Death is one of them.”

Huh?

Death as an Ally

If you don’t make friends with Death, you can’t heal. Instead, you end up carrying your disappointments and disruptions around like heavy baggage, and all it does is weigh you down.

The relationship you thought was going to be “the one” but turned out to be “the biggest betrayal of your life”…

The fast money you made that turned into dust just as quickly…

The diagnoses that hijacked your health and wellness…

Each one is an opportunity to face Death with purpose so you can lay your burdens to rest. It’s an opportunity to let go of that which isn’t working in your life so you can move forward and embrace something that is nurturing and more in alignment with your soul and purpose.

The problem is, Death is scary. It’s shadowed, dark, and fraught with mystery.

When you stand before death, you don’t know what to expect. All you see is a dark void. You don’t know what’s on the other side of death. You don’t know what the path forward looks like.

Because of this, it’s easy to say, “no thank you” to death, but when you do that, you end up carrying each disappointment and disruption around like weights balanced one on top of the other, creating a big, heavy burden.

Ultimately, they hold you back. You can’t experience your full potential, you can’t live life or move forward until you’ve transformed them.

Recognize Death in Your Life

If you’re pining for the “good ol’ days” chances are somewhere along the way, something happened and you never let go. Something in your life died–a relationship, your health, your finances–but when you saw Death, when you saw your opportunity to heal, you felt fear and turned your back on it. Now you’re just carrying around dead weight. The more you do that, the more difficult it becomes to let go. The more you don’t let go, the heavier you will feel.

It’s a vicious cycle.

The good news is that you can end it.

Release the Dead Stuff

Letting go can be as easy as a tree dropping leaves in autumn. All you have to do is let go. The hard part is holding on. But if you’ve been holding on tightly for decades, it can feel difficult to shrug it off.

If your hand has been gripping a hammer for an hour, unclenching the muscles feels awkward at first. There’s stiffness, maybe pain. It takes awhile to readjust to the feeling of having an open hand. Flexibility comes slowly, but the more you work the muscle, opening and closing your fingers, the easier it gets.

The same is true for soul healing. I once did a soul retrieval for a client who’d been carrying around dead weight from a work disaster. Her job had ended more than a decade ago, and she’d dealt with it to the best of her ability, but she was carrying around guilt and shame that had woven its way into her life, impacting every decision.

After the soul retrieval, her life seemed to fall apart. It felt like death after death after death. In reality, she was shedding the things she’d been holding on to that weren’t working. It was scary. Before the soul retrieval, she’d been feeling pretty good, but afterword, she felt awful.

I told her that sometimes healing is like that. It gets worse before it gets better. The best way through it is to be present with what’s happening and to know it’s temporary.

That’s the beauty of life. Nothing is permanent. Everything changes. Sometimes that’s disappointing, but other times impermanence can become a lifeline that lets you sink into your difficult experience and trust that it will get you to more inspiring times.

The more you allow that to happen, the faster the healing happens.

My client trusted my council enough to let herself surrender to her experience. She came out the other end, shining and bright, full of renewed hope and new ideas, ready to catapult herself forward into her purpose.

Holding on to the past keeps you stuck there. Trust yourself. You know how to move forward, and painful as it may be, it’s worth the letting go.

Where is Death lingering in your life, ready to help you release that which you no longer need?

That is an important question to answer.

sweet dreaming,

Amy

The Importance Of Remembering Where You Come From

By Amy Brucker

Has this ever happened to you:

As the weather turns cooler, my go-go-go has gone-gone-gone, and I want to retreat into the coziness of woolen socks and spiced tea.

But my desire goes beyond wanting to feel snug. There’s a distinct feeling that permeates these moments, a sensation that cannot be put into words.

It’s the mesmerizing movement of dipping a tea bag.

The soft glow of candle light casting shadows in the corners.

The feeling of warm with a blanket by the fire-lit hearth.

They all create this inner experience that is beyond cozy.

It’s Koselig (ku’-se-lee’).

Connecting with Your Ancestors (without Knowing It)

Without realizing it, I’ve been experiencing koselig my entire life. It’s a Norwegian word that loosely translates to “cozy.” But unlike the English word “cozy”, koselig is richer, deeper, going beyond woolen socks and cable knit sweaters. It’s a feeling. An inner glow.

My Norwegian kinfolk cultivate koselig all year round, not only when the snow falls. You can feel it in the festivities of Syttende Mai (their version of Fourth of July), or the pizza place in the middle of town. It’s a state of mind and sensation independent of weather, place, or time.

My experience of koselig is a gentle reminder of my roots, of where I come from. Genetics hold so much more than the code for eye color. These cellular memories are directions for living. Sometimes they nurture us, bringing a sense of wholeness that we need, not just to survive, but to thrive.

Remembering Where You Come From

What might you be experiencing that is a remnant of your ancestral past?

If your ancestors emigrated several generations ago to your current continent, if you were adopted, or if your family doesn’t talk about the past, that might be a difficult question to answer, but see if you can. The more connected you feel to your ancestors, the more meaning your life will hold.

Knowing where you come from helps you grows strong roots, roots that hold you steady when you’re feeling unstable. These roots tap into your family tree so they can share their secrets with you:

You come from a long lineage of people who overcame life threatening hardships to ultimately deliver you into the world. You are a gift from those who walked before you. Take comfort in the knowing that you are never alone. Your ancestors are with you, dreaming you into being, just as you have dreamed their lives into memories and stories that bring laughter and tears.

So where did you come from? What are you doing that is reminiscent of the past?

How are you connecting to your ancestors without knowing it? Food for thought.

Sweet dreaming,

Amy

Visitations From My Cat Angus & Samhain Celebrations

By Amy Brucker

I’ve been thinking about death a lot these days. Since my cat Angus died a couple weeks ago my house has felt noticeably void of life. There’s a stillness that permeates everything. Even the couch seems to miss him.

But last week, Angus visited me.

The dream was so real I knew it was him in spirit form. He sat on our bed, in his favorite place, and let us pet his silky fur. It was deeply satisfying to hold him one more time, especially since his dream self was so happy and healthy.

A Sacred Time of Remembrance

In my neighborhood, everything is letting go. Leaves are falling from the trees. Daylight hours are fading. These subtle shifts are gentle reminders that death is a necessary part of life.

It’s also Samhain, the Celtic holiday my ancestors celebrated to remember those who went before them (and to ensure the ancestors were happily fed with offerings of food and drink so they didn’t haunt the harvest and ruin it). This liminal period is a time when the veil between worlds is thinnest, so watch your dreams and waking dream-states for visitations from loved ones, including your pets.

Samhain Questions to Contemplate

Who do you need to remember?

Who went before you, paving the way for the life you live today?

Who were your ancestors? (Not just family, but friends and teachers, too)?

What joys did they celebrate?

What hardships did they endure?

Every one of their experiences was a thread woven into your life. Each encounter a small, but perhaps significant piece, that helped shape the person you are today.

What can you do to honor them?

To honor how they impacted your life?

Perhaps a traditional Samhain celebration with an ancestral altar and feast? Some carved turnips with candles inside to ward off evil spirits?

Or perhaps you’ll create your own tradition to celebrate the past.

Whatever you do, have fun!

Sweet dreaming,

Amy

Amy Brucker ~ My Cat Angus Died This Week ~

By Amy Brucker

My cat Angus died this past Thursday. He was 18 years old and a little shaman who would curl up next to my clients and do his part to help them in their healing process.

He lived a long, good life, but it was time for him to say goodbye, and October was the perfect time for him to leave.

October is a Time for Releasing

Of releasing golden leaves that fall like confetti to the ground.

Of releasing grief so it can flow through us (instead of turning into depression).

Of releasing whatever is getting in the way of you living a good life.

Releasing Angus was a process for me. His small body started to decline a couple years ago, so I was able to prepare for the inevitable.

Every day I gave thanks for his grace in my life, for his presence. I reveled in his softness, knowing that someday it would be a memory. I took mental pictures, memorizing the subtle angles of his nose and chin, noticing how he sometimes looked like Homer Simpson, but other times like a wise Buddha, and laughing at the juxtaposition.

Releasing can be a big dramatic ritual with heart-wrenching cries, or a simple whisper of goodbye.

But however you express it, the most important thing is to be present. Presences gives your heart a chance to really feel your feelings, to give the mix of sadness and joy a place to co-exist so they can weave together a healing balm for your soul.

I said goodbye to Angus this morning, full of tears and a heavy heart. I created an altar with his photo, his favorite toy, some treats, and a candle. I’m grateful for how he shared his life with me.

What about you?

What do you need to be present with today?

What do you need to release? How does your heart feel in releasing it?

How can you make room for the joy and the sorrow so you can create your own soul medicine?

sweet dreams to you,

Amy

The Holy Power of Tiger Dreams

By Amy Brucker

Tiger-Leap-In-The-Water-Wallpaper

I was standing by a tree when flames erupted from the branches. I ran to save myself, but a tiger leapt out and chased me.

The ground held no refuge, so I did the only thing I could think of: I left my body and floated away.

The Holy Power of Tiger Dreams

Whenever I dream of Tiger, I wake up feeling blessed, even if the dream was scary. There’s something about her power, her regalness, that makes me feel like I was visited by something Holy.

In many cultures, west on the Medicine Wheel is about autumn, water, and letting go. The corresponding animal? Big Cats.

Big cats, like Tiger, are ferocious in nature. They sit in utter stillness, with patience and keen observation, before pouncing on their prey. When they do, their bloody maw snarls a victory cry. Or perhaps it’s the cry of pleasure.

Unapologetically powerful, Tiger is at once fierce and gracefully feline.

Tigers remind us of the power of radical transformation. The Death of Death. The point of no return.

When Tiger comes calling, you have an opportunity to watch and learn. She’s inviting you to patiently get ready to pounce. She blesses you with courage and perseverance. But you have to be willing to trust her presence in your life. If you don’t, you’ll get burned.

Dreaming of Tiger: A Struggle with Power

When I had this dream, it was the mid-nineties, a time when I was beginning to feel the stirrings of my connection to Spirit as well as my call to shamanism. With these callings came a sense of aloneness and lostness.

On one level, my dream indicated I was having a difficult time dealing with my personal power–my purpose, my passion, my anger–and that my tendency was to run from it and ultimately go out of body as a form of escape. My dream invited me to meet with tiger face to face and learn from her. It took me years to find the courage to make that happen.

Long before I had my dream, William Blake connected Tiger to Fire. He wrote:

Tyger Tyger, burning bright,
In the forests of the night;
What immortal hand or eye,
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

Blake goes on to ask, “Did he who made the Lamb make thee?” Meaning, did the same hand create the gentle, timid lamb that created the fierce, powerful tiger?

This comparison reminds me of the times in my life when I’ve wondered about the merging of my own gentle and timid nature with my fierce power. Can both be “right”? Can both be a part of the Divine?

When Tiger appears in our dreams, she may be inviting us to notice how well we’ve integrated our power into our lives. Do we run from it? Does it make us go out of body in an attempt to deny it? Do we cuddle up with it and enjoy the warmth?

Next time you have a tiger dream, pay attention to how she shows up and notice if there is a correlation with how you are showing up with your power.

Do a waking journey with her in the imaginal realm and let her guide you deeper into union with your inner tiger.

Then see what happens.

Sweet dreaming,

Amy

How To Survive When The Flames of Hell Are Burning Down Your Door

By Amy Brucker

Sometimes life feels like a hellish fire burning down the only door leading in and out of the house.

In other words, miserably trapped in a bad situation.

And in these moments, it can feel impossible to find enough water to douse the flames.

Affirmations, essential oils, positive thinking just seem to melt away, leaving you feeling vulnerable and alone.

So how do you survive when hell has unleashed her fury?

I wrote about the importance of surrender, a simple concept that people have a difficult time fully grasping because when they think of situations like a house burning down, surrendering is the last thing that makes sense.

They equate surrendering with giving up. Or of settling for less than they desire. And these two beliefs couldn’t be further from the truth of what it means to surrender.

In the Dream Priestess Medicine Wheel, August ushers in autumn, and with it comes the beginning of a period of release.

It’s a period of shedding that which we no longer need, of laying down our burdens and trusting in our Essential Self and Source for guidance.

But how does this help you when the house is burning down? Won’t you die?

This metaphoric house-fire could be any number of things:

Too much paperwork.

Too many clients.

Not enough money.

Lack of direction.

Being physically or emotionally attacked.

Or even a literal fire.

It could be anything that feels life threatening or impossible to deal with.

And when you’re in that place, surrender seems like a ridiculous concept because it feels like giving up, and giving up would ultimately lead to your demise. Since you’re biologically programmed to survive at all costs, surrendering doesn’t feel right, so you try to do everything but surrender.

But think of this: if you were a kid in a house on fire, how would you want your mom or dad to show up for you?

Would you want them to freak out, run around shouting, “We’re going to die! We’re going to die!!!” Arms flailing and eyes bugged out?

No way. That would make the situation worse.

You’d want them to calmly and quickly deal with the situation, and find a way out for you.

And that’s why mastering the art of surrendering can save lives.

When you know how to surrender, you discover that it’s possible to drop enough fear so you can access your Essential Self, God, the Divine, whatever you want to call it. That’s when the magic happens because you can tune in for guidance on what to do next. Sometimes the very act of surrendering causes clarity and next steps to make themselves readily apparent.

For someone practiced at this, it takes about 1 second, which is why it’s good to practice before the fire erupts. You want the process to become second nature before disaster strikes.

Surrender is not about giving up. It’s not about allowing bad things to happen to you.

It’s about trusting there is a way out or through or beyond whatever is happening, and that your Essential Self knows how to help you navigate it.

sweet dreaming,

Amy

Making It Through The Tough Times

By Amy Brucker

When things get tough, I tend to struggle a bit before I remember it doesn’t have to be so hard—I can surrender.

Surrendering is second nature to me now, but there was a time when the thought of surrendering was terrifying. I used to feel that I had to will my way through the tough times, or lie down in defeat and let depression settle in.

But those days are long gone, and with the Wisdom of Surrender comes a sort of soul relief, an exhalation. I can breathe so much better without the struggle.

Surrender your struggle to the Universe so it can release you from your burden.

Whenever you feel bound in place, or a strong push to move forward (that isn’t working), remind yourself to surrender.

Remember that the tough times are temporary.

You can call on the Divine to hold the burden for you so you can find clarity and renewed purpose. Then wait. Clarity will waft in like a feather on the wind. It might take a day or a week, but it will come. The trick is to have patience.

When I teach this practice to my clients and students, it confuses them at first.

Are you giving up? They ask, not out loud, but I can hear it in their silence.

No, I’m not giving up.

I surrender to the Universe. To what you might call God, Goddess, the Divine, Source, Spirit.

Surrender is like asking a trusted friend to hold your bag of groceries while you fumble for your keys. You know she’ll hold them for you until you’re able to hold them again. Or maybe she’ll just carry them into the house for you, set them down, and put them away. This is the beauty of surrender. Sometimes you get your baggage back, sometimes it disappears completely, but however the saga unfolds, your needs are met.

In order to surrender, to truly surrender, it helps to trust that on some level, all is well no matter what.

That doesn’t mean things will always go your way. Or that people won’t get sick and die.

In fact, things on the earthly plane may look beyond repair.

But on some level, on the way to your purest Essence or God or Goddess or the Universe, all is well. When you connect to this place, it’s easier to let go of struggle and surrender so ultimately you can move forward.

When you surrender, you become a channel for Spirit to move through you. It’s from this centered place that you can create soulutions to challenging problems.

Surrendering is a simple and subtle, yet freeing sensation.

You know that feeling of total relaxation? Like when you get into bed after a good day, sink into the mattress and feel like you’re floating on a cloud as your conscious mind slowly slips into oblivion?

That’s what it feels like to surrender.

There is a knowing that all will be well if you can trust your true Essence.

This is a place of non-duality. There is no good or bad, but something else entirely. It’s a sort of Divine Neutrality, except it has a hint of inspiration and a dash of acceptance.

It’s a peaceful place.

Will you join me there?

Sweet dreaming,

Amy

First Ever Women’s Dream Temple Retreat ~ You’re invited

By Amy Brucker

I’m excited to announce the first Dream Temple Retreat—for Women:

Dreaming the Sacred into Life

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During this inspiring weekend, we’ll slip into the dreamtime with soulful women who are devoted to living from their Essence.

We’ll sit in sisterhood and

…create sacred space with altars and art.

…embody our dreams with dream sharing, dream journeying, dream theater, dream art, soul (energy) tracking, ancestral healing, plant medicine—whatever Spirit calls us to do and be.

… dance in the moonlight.

… drum by the fire.

… tell stories.

… share insights.

… give offerings.

And through it all, we’ll have fun!

This work is magical. This work is deep. This work is powerful.

Will you join me? I hope so!

Click here to learn more

sweet dreaming,

Amy

P.S. Early bird registration is due this Friday. I did this so I could get a sense of how many people are interested. If you are, let me know! I would love to meet you in person. Here’s the link again.